Tag Archives: cats

A Day In The Life: My Writing Process

Since I am working on several projects at the moment, I thought I would share my writing process. People always ask me, “How do your write such consistently good stuff?”  Actually, people never ask me that.  Most people ask me,”What do you do for money?”  Which I respond, “I am a gigolo under the name Ball Zout”, and that usually shuts them up.

My writing process is normal, I suppose.  Usually when I wake up in the morning the cat is laying on me so I have to be careful not to crush him, which I never am, so I am never actually awake until I hear “meeowwwww!”  Then I am pretty much up.  I go into the kitchen and start the coffee.  This is necessary.  I like to imagine that if coffee was a person it would be Tim Tebow.  You try and go as long as you can without putting him in, but everyone is going psycho and Kyle Orton is a fruitcake, so you eventually have to put him in, but you know in the back of your mind you are unleashing a force stronger than anything this world has ever seen and will either bite you in the ass or you will win some games and lose some, but even if you do lose you could lose for 6 six years in a row and the fans would never blame Tebow, so you would be stuck with him, or you would write a novel.  All this depending on whether you were using Tim Tebow or coffee.

So I’ve got my coffee.  The cat has been following me around and biting my toes since I woke up, so I fed him while the coffee was making to put a stop to that.  He follows me to my desk and we assume our positions, me in my chair, and him on the desk next to my keyboard.  We will move in and out of these positions for the remainder of the day, sort of like moving in and out of consciousness, but with a lot less blacking out.  Or maybe not, I can’t really remember.  What dimension is this?  I could’ve sworn I had more fingers…

Now I’m at my desk, computer on.  I pull up the news first, read some crap, mostly forums, then pull up my screenplay. Okay, now It’s fucking GO TIME.  I find my place and catch myself up.  This takes a few minutes.  I find the best way to think is staring out the window.  So many more ideas come to me from the window than anywhere else in my apartment.  In fact, I can’t think of a time when the fan or dishwasher gave me a good idea.  Maybe I should exchange them for windows?  I suppose windows aren’t very good at washing dishes, so that could be counter-productive in some aspects of life.

Okay, I’ve finished thinking.  I’ve figured out where I want to take the story, and I begin writing the next scene.  I will take periodic breaks for thinking, breaking, and eating, but I normally write for 8-10 hours a day, Monday through Friday.  I like to break up my day, and I generally write at a smooth, steady pace.  Rushing creativity is not my idea of a good time.

That’s a work day in a nutshell for me.  Thanks for reading!

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Show Some Love

*Ahem.  I was recently recognized by a blogger, Whose blog I enjoyed very much, and I am thereby obliged to make my own list of blogs which I feel deserve the Versatile Blogger Award, as well as thank said blogger for the award.  I was so happy when you thought my blog deserved an award, you made me shit my pants.  Seriously, those boxers went straight to the garbage.  Not even gonna try and wash those things.  Thank you, Joanna!

Now if I understand this award correctly, the versatile blogger is for a blog/blogger that flies under the radar yet is worthy of praise for its excellent content.  As bloggers, we put ourselves out there and hope against hope that people will enjoy what we have to say.  Often, our blogs will go unrecognized for days, weeks, months, years, lifetimes, light years, eons, decades, minutes, oops I’m going the wrong way, and it can be very frustrating. That is why it’s always nice to hear when someone thinks your blog is the shiznit.

The award contains 3 parts:

1. List seven things about yourself.

2. Thank the blogger who linked you and link them back.

3. Make your own list of blogs who you think deserve the award.

Seven things about me:

1. I write in four forms: for the screen, this blog, in narrative, and cat scratch, literally.

2. I have four cats, and every Saturday we have kitty Olympics where I pit them against each other, and sometimes myself, in various sporting events like: Sleeping, Tail Catching, Eating, Annoying the Shit of Me While I Am Trying to Work, Running Then Sleeping, Licking, and Being Scared.

Okay, so that was an exaggeration.  But really I have one cat, and his name is Mr. Gold.  I got him from a shelter about two months ago.  He has a scar on his side and part of his ear is missing, but he has more personality than some people I know.

 

3. I do not like being cold.  Being cold for me is one of the worst things that can happen to a person at any given time.  I would rather be forced to watch this video below on loop for however long I am going to be cold for, than actually being cold for that period of time.

 

4.  I am fixing up a motorcycle, and I just bought a one-speed fixie.  I am trying to phase out my car so I can sell it.  Two wheels everything, baby!

5.  I do not practice moderation, I am incapable.  For me, it’s all or nothing. This plays to my advantage in some things, but usually it just screws me over because I find most things not worth doing 100%, which is a very strange conundrum please don’t get me started on it.

6. I do not posses the ability to have a normal job.  I can literally take nothing seriously, especially something as cliche as an office.  So tell your friends about my blog!  A new one is coming soon!

An example of me in an office:

Manager: Did you finish that report I asked you to do last week?

Alex: Yes

Manager: Can I have it?

Alex: Would you like to have something else instead?

Manager: No, I would like the report.

Alex: What about a smile?  I have lots of those to give.

Manager: Get out of my-

Alex: Office!

(silence)

Manager: You’re fi-

Alex: Hired!

7. I’m a traveler.  A nomad.  A wandering soul.  Help, help!  I’m suffocating here!

For shits and giggles here is a picture of me.  No I am not a lumberjack, this was just a temporary job.  I was a volunteer for Americorps.

 

Now on to the Award:

The internet is incredibly saturated with legit information, misinformation, useless information (which I specialize in), and pictures of cats.  None of these things are bad per say, but it makes it increasingly difficult for someone to break in and be heard over the thousands of other people screaming for attention.

I don’t claim to know how to be heard, but what I can say is why I like the blogs I like, and why I write my blog the way I do.  I believe the ingredients for a good blog are as follows: originality, uniqueness, relatablility, and humor.  I try for all of these, god knows I don’t always hit, but these traits are what make blogs interesting to read.  Blogs come from a unique perspective with a unique voice, so they should reflect that.  That being said, the blogs below show signs of these qualities, or I just fucking like them, or whatever.

And the Versatile Blogger Award goes to:

http://mooselicker.wordpress.com/

http://whimsywhims.wordpress.com/

http://rantingandraisingconcerns.wordpress.com/

http://stufficantputonfacebook.wordpress.com/

http://masslessparticles.wordpress.com/

http://studentdesignblog.wordpress.com/

http://somethinghascometobugme.wordpress.com/

http://coalfieldstocornfields.wordpress.com/

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