Where am I?

When I was a young boy, a tree came down from Outer Space (boo-ya!) and landed in my backyard.  Then it spread its mighty branches and grew the most magnificent leaves of blue, red, green, and purple.  It called itself the Unknowledge Tree, keeper of all pointless and useless knowledge in the universe.  When I turned eighteen it told me that if I went and bought it cigarettes and porn, it would tell me everything it knows.  So I did just that, and it kept its promise.  I am now sharing that information with the world.

Prepare to receive all the knowledge that you didn’t know you need, and probably shouldn’t exist, but does. Confused?  So am I.  But that’s why we are here: To learn.  Because without learning, there is no intelligence, and without intelligence, there would be no television, and without television, it would be a lot easier for me to get a job as a writer.  So sit back, buckle up, get your finger on that little scroll button on your mouse which is extremely handy and I don’t know how I ever used a mouse without it, and prepare to read the most exciting (pow pow!) and informative blog in the world!

Questions/comments/requests: unknowledgetree (at) gmail

10 responses to “Where am I?

  1. I ❤ you.
    One Follow button about to be clicked.

  2. Thank god you got freshly pressed otherwise I wouldn’t have stumbled upon this!! Hahaha f’n brilliant =)

  3. Brilliance, they name is Unknowledge. So glad I found this. So glad.

  4. Lead the way Unknowledge Tree! I’m ready to scroll with my two bare fingers (I graduated from PC in 2008–though I do LOVE that scroll on the mouse which delicately clicks as it turns)!

  5. Stephanie

    You might not be a writer for ‘The Man’, but you’re a writer for hoards of fans. Keep writing. I’ll keep reading.

  6. hannahrose42

    Hello! I found your blog randomly and really enjoyed your posts. Congratulations, I have decided to nominate you for the Versatile Blogger Award! Check it out here:

  7. Rae

    Ha, I love your About page!

  8. I’ve nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award!! Hope you’ll accept it and start posting again soon 🙂

    • Hey Emily! Thanks for the nomination, but I have already been given that in the past. I will plug your blog when I get a chance, and I am working on a new post, so no worries. You can even vote for the post if you like, just go to my most recent post.

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