How to Get a Date – Sealing the Deal

For those of you now lucky enough to be engaged in conversation with your desired partner, don’t worry, I am here to guide you.  If you missed the first part of this series on getting to this point,  you can still check it out here.  If you got here on your own you are a liar!  I’m just kidding.  But seriously, I don’t believe you. Although, people have been doing this for many years without this blog, so I guess it is possible.  What was I talking about?  Oh right, conversation.  Here is how to have effective date-getting conversation.

3. Conversation

Okay, so you’ve attracted each other with your respective displays, and his pick-up line was successful, now it’s time to engage in, *gulp, conversation.  For some people this part comes easy, for others not so much.  The most important thing is to have relevant topics to discuss.  Also, keep in mind that in this initial conversation you don’t want to ask any questions.  Questions are for the first date.  This meeting is all about being funny and interesting.  When you do give information, you might as well lie and make yourself sound more interesting, and just clear everything up later when you two are dating.  You are going to want to split you time between these two categories: compliments and topics of discussion.

Compliments to make:

– His/her attire

– His/her hair

– His/her genitalia

– His/her finger width/length (depends on personal preference)

– His/her facial expressions (one of my favorites)

Topics of Discussion

– The decor of the bar

– The decor of the city in general

– The decor of your mother’s basement where you live use to live

– What you do for a living

– What you wish you did for a living

– What your more less successful friends do for a living


Date Acquisition Successful


Remember to relax, be yourself.  Let the words flow out of your mouth like a river rushes effortlessly over the edge of a cliff.  Be careful though, because sometimes trash comes over the edge of a waterfall, along with branches, animals, boats, and people in barrels.  If too many of these things fall out of your mouth, be sure to be near a trash can because it’s called vomit and you definitely drank too much.  Good luck!


Filed under How to

7 responses to “How to Get a Date – Sealing the Deal

  1. Sounds like my kinda man!

  2. alvintobias

    “Date Acquisition Successful” hahaha!

  3. I think it has no fixed formula.

  4. You could always compliment someone’s genital hair. That gets two of the way real fast.

  5. (Note:I recommend reading this comment in a British accent.)
    You can see the sexual tension growing in each stage of the illustration. Notice how much more firmly the male holds the cup in the last stage compared to the first. Observe the evolution of the female’s expression from a look of apathy to that of primal carnality. Such magnificent attention to detail.

  6. Pingback: How to Get a Date – 3 Steps | The Unknowledge Tree

Come on, tell me how you really feel.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s